Lost- 31
Hunter’ Rose Vs Sun Shyne
Introducing Trinidad B.
Often times we fall in love, and forget about the person that matters the most, and in all honesty that person sometimes won’t recognize the fact, I’ve been trying to live my life for my family, and other people for 10 years, and this has become like a routine of mines to just give up, and make whomever at that time the my full ground why I’m in the background every single time, I thought this time a around would somehow be different, but in all honesty it turned out to be the exact same way, but it’s worse simply because love is involved, and with that others. Somehow other than family it wasn’t. Of course love from your family is a different type of love. Sometimes we tend to forget that the people we care about the most. In the end can bring us the most pain threw out, and I’ve been accused of this a few months ago, and I accepted it wearing the color as if, I invented myself, I been Hunter’ Rose for the last past two years wondering how the hell my life came to this, and when will it get to a point where, I could call it a life. Looking back at Sun Shyne, and how she had more to offer than anything, I have now. That’s the part, I feel most don’t get about her. She was a force to be reckoned with only because she wasn’t as content with making it work for others that didn’t care if she happy. Sure it took some time, but the feelings that, I need to feel got there, and when it became me treating people how they treated me, I was less hurt knowing that, I didn’t have to carry those unwanted emotions about someone who didn’t care at all, and then, I became the bitch that didn’t give a fuck, and at that time it was about my money, and that’s it. Sun Shyne went through a lot to get to the mental that made her a bad bitch, but in its entirety she allow the feeling of wanted luv to find, or at least what she thought appeared to be. Then the backlash of that led to Hunter’ Rose in which this person had nothing. How do you go from having enough to not having anything at all? Only to allow the roles to be reversed. Inside this had to have been the worst, I gave me up yet again to see where life took me, and yes, I found love, and I would never take away the fact that, I have of all that, I need, but not everything, I without a question have to give me back. This is me that I’m missing, and to have that person you love, or maybe possibly love you back have you feel that they don’t understand. Let me just say this because, I had a conversation with my Mom, and this came about, I told her that I’m very good a breaking down a person, and when someone tell you something of course it’s not always what they mean. Just like if you were to be something, or do something in life that your parents don’t approve of, but they tell you. You still my child, I love you. That doesn’t mean that they want you to do it. This just means that you’re their child they love you, and that’s it, and that’s all I got. What do, I want…. I thought that, I wanted to feel that in my heart that, I had people that, I loved in my corner about how, I was happy living my life, but now not so much, I don’t really think I’m concerned about how anybody feels about the choices, I make longs as it doesn’t affect them. This just happens to be a choice that affects them. For different reasons, but still reason none the less, I thought that when you get to certain point that you could end your journey of soul searching. You would see a glow at the end of a rainbow. Hell, I don’t even like rainbows. Never did, but at least, I gave them a chance; I even did research on them. This doesn’t change the fact that they are pretty, I just rather see a unique solid color stripe upon the sky. So who is Trinidad…? Well she is somebody that’s going to first, and foremost do right by herself, and I think that when she surfaces. It’s going to be a lot for her to have to adjust to, or not. Maybe the people around will have to, I owe it to me to be the person after 10 years held back for so many others, I fear that Sun Shyne old ways will resurface, but I honestly never stop embracing my past, I just for those…. More or Less suppressed it; I don’t need anybody to be in my life that don’t feel comfortable with me. Even if that means losing all that, I have now, I rather feel more like a woman alone than less of a woman around those who would rather see me another way, and that reality for them, I refuse to live anymore….
Often times we fall in love, and forget about the person that matters the most, and in all honesty that person sometimes won’t recognize the fact, I’ve been trying to live my life for my family, and other people for 10 years, and this has become like a routine of mines to just give up, and make whomever at that time the my full ground why I’m in the background every single time, I thought this time a around would somehow be different, but in all honesty it turned out to be the exact same way, but it’s worse simply because love is involved, and with that others. Somehow other than family it wasn’t. Of course love from your family is a different type of love. Sometimes we tend to forget that the people we care about the most. In the end can bring us the most pain threw out, and I’ve been accused of this a few months ago, and I accepted it wearing the color as if, I invented myself, I been Hunter’ Rose for the last past two years wondering how the hell my life came to this, and when will it get to a point where, I could call it a life. Looking back at Sun Shyne, and how she had more to offer than anything, I have now. That’s the part, I feel most don’t get about her. She was a force to be reckoned with only because she wasn’t as content with making it work for others that didn’t care if she happy. Sure it took some time, but the feelings that, I need to feel got there, and when it became me treating people how they treated me, I was less hurt knowing that, I didn’t have to carry those unwanted emotions about someone who didn’t care at all, and then, I became the bitch that didn’t give a fuck, and at that time it was about my money, and that’s it. Sun Shyne went through a lot to get to the mental that made her a bad bitch, but in its entirety she allow the feeling of wanted luv to find, or at least what she thought appeared to be. Then the backlash of that led to Hunter’ Rose in which this person had nothing. How do you go from having enough to not having anything at all? Only to allow the roles to be reversed. Inside this had to have been the worst, I gave me up yet again to see where life took me, and yes, I found love, and I would never take away the fact that, I have of all that, I need, but not everything, I without a question have to give me back. This is me that I’m missing, and to have that person you love, or maybe possibly love you back have you feel that they don’t understand. Let me just say this because, I had a conversation with my Mom, and this came about, I told her that I’m very good a breaking down a person, and when someone tell you something of course it’s not always what they mean. Just like if you were to be something, or do something in life that your parents don’t approve of, but they tell you. You still my child, I love you. That doesn’t mean that they want you to do it. This just means that you’re their child they love you, and that’s it, and that’s all I got. What do, I want…. I thought that, I wanted to feel that in my heart that, I had people that, I loved in my corner about how, I was happy living my life, but now not so much, I don’t really think I’m concerned about how anybody feels about the choices, I make longs as it doesn’t affect them. This just happens to be a choice that affects them. For different reasons, but still reason none the less, I thought that when you get to certain point that you could end your journey of soul searching. You would see a glow at the end of a rainbow. Hell, I don’t even like rainbows. Never did, but at least, I gave them a chance; I even did research on them. This doesn’t change the fact that they are pretty, I just rather see a unique solid color stripe upon the sky. So who is Trinidad…? Well she is somebody that’s going to first, and foremost do right by herself, and I think that when she surfaces. It’s going to be a lot for her to have to adjust to, or not. Maybe the people around will have to, I owe it to me to be the person after 10 years held back for so many others, I fear that Sun Shyne old ways will resurface, but I honestly never stop embracing my past, I just for those…. More or Less suppressed it; I don’t need anybody to be in my life that don’t feel comfortable with me. Even if that means losing all that, I have now, I rather feel more like a woman alone than less of a woman around those who would rather see me another way, and that reality for them, I refuse to live anymore….
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